A National Coal Board Christmas ‘do’

When I worked at one of the National Coal Board offices in Nottinghamshire, the Christmas ‘do’ was talked about long before and long after we actually enjoyed it. There was much speculation about it; where would it be?

What would be on the menu? What would the ladies be wearing? More importantly, who would be getting off with who?

In the early days we waited for the bosses to let the departments know if we would finish work at lunch time. The sensible ones, and those who had respect for (or fear of) their marital status would go home then, or stay for the buffet which the tea lady had spent the morning preparing, then disappear. The rest of us would aim to get as much booze down us as we could. This was all paid for out of the N.C.B Recreation fund. The DJ – usually one of the Geologists - put on the music (vinyl ruled in the seventies) and we would be dancing in the corridors or the large reception area, or watching out for those of our workmates who were heading for dark places.

Around 3:30 pm when it was getting dark, those of us who were more or less compos mentis would be comparing notes on who we hadn’t seen for a while and forming plans to track down the absentees. Melanie was on the door, listing those who left the building and whether they left singly, in pairs, or separately with a view to being a pair imminently.

The Drawing Office revealed at least three couples who were getting to know each other better. If any of the bosses had left, their offices were up for grabs (or whatever else you could manage), but the star of the show was the stationery cupboard. It was small enough for 2 people to squeeze in and it had the advantage of a lock and key. Savvy staff would have secreted the key in their pocket on arrival that morning and we all knew that it would be found when we had all left.

I was a good girl. I limited myself to snogging one of the Geologists who was fit, but married, for as long as I could keep him busy.

After the ‘do’ - around 6 pm -  the tea lady who doubled as the cleaner came to clear up. She was met by little piles of vomit, empty bottles and half-full glasses, crumbs everywhere, and on attempting to hoover the Drawing Office, a couple fast asleep under a drawing board alongside their underwear, that they were not wearing.

She must have complained to the management because after that it was decided that the event would be held in the local pub!

JT

Photo by Dorine Allali on Unsplash